Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
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