That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
Trying to figure out the logistics of putting my laptop speakers on this plate with the last slice of pizza. Too drunk to move the plate. Not an option.
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
