have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize