Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
Randomize
