ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
23 People Reveal The Worst Culture Shock They’ve Ever Experienced While Traveling
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
27 People Confess Their Proudest Fap
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
Oh, fuck yeah. I swear I came with every bite. Not even joking. Messiest meal ever.
Wow, thanks for ruining pizza for me. I didn't think it was possible.
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
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