Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
my dad just said 'either you're lying about your plans tonight or you kids are really lame nowadays'. maybe we should nix the singles saturday slumber party and go to a bar.
You texted the wrong number but that's probably the best call you'll ever make.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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