Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
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