Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
Piatas plus fireworks don't mix well
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement 😭😂
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
Randomize
