dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
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