hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
Btw, remind me to tell you about how I had to cancel my crazy wild sex plans with Will b/c my roommate came back from his trip after a day b/c Canada wouldn't let him in. Fucking cockblock.
Actually that's the whole story. You don't have to remind me.
Randomize