i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
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