i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize
