We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
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