It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Randomize
