I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
got in a fight at the bar because some dude thought i was being sarcastic when i told him "sweet mustache". it really was a sweet mustache
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
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