Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
last night I used snow as a chaser
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
