party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
Randomize
