Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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