Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize