Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
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