At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
Little spoons don't ask big questions
She just used a chaser for red wine.
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
I stole all of the toasting champagne and did an interpretive dance to "wind beneath my wings". I am literally everything you're not supposed to do at weddings.
But your showmanship is impeccable.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
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