so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
I'm sobbing to NWA
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Randomize
