Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
Randomize
