I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
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