he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
