i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
I just checked and if you bring a picture of your ex they will shred it and give you a free 'hater shot'. Would it be too much to print off one of their wedding pictures and bring it?
I really love that you're not going the 'why am I not married and having a kid yet?' route, but rather 'thank god I dodged that bullet'
Randomize
