never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
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