how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
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