To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
