living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
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