Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Randomize