She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
The adults are the big ones right?
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
