I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
