Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
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