His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
How does it feel to date your dad?
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.