go do what you do best...puke behind churches
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
See, the Lortab wasn't working enough, so I thought "hey, vodka can speed that up! That's how science works!" Which probably should've been my indication that the Lortab was in fact working
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
Randomize
