I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
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