I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize
