Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
