Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
Randomize
