This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Randomize
