Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize