i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
Randomize
