hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
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