it wasn't lemon gatorade
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
So squirting runs in the family.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
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