return my video game
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
Where'd you go last night?
Don't EVER let me photobomb a group of lesbians again. They made me their "straight mascot" and I ended up singing Donna summer tunes for beers at their apartment complex.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
