Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Randomize
