I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
Randomize
