The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
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