after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
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